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Quarter Lyfe Crisis

Scared that my youth will be sucked away by law school in a few short months. Here, I document the crazy, boring, funny and random things I do [and the people along for the ride]
My first year of law school is over. I really have mixed feelings. This year was really hard emotionally. Work-wise it was fine. I could handle everything and pretty much did everything I wanted. I really think I had a great school-life balance. I talked to my friends on the phone more than ever, at least 3 times a week. I texted with them mostly everyday…I hung out with boys on the side. Visited home a few times. I was probably the most social person out of the black people. Our house was the kick it house, so people were always here. Lots of game nights, parties and general ratchetness. I never really experienced stress either. IDK it just wasn’t the 1L shitshow I was expecting. But omg, there was SO MUCH DRAMA. Allll the time and I felt like I was always at the center of it. I’ve NEVER had that problem in my life. Law school was literally like Basketball Wives. There were so many fights and fallouts with girls and guys and he said and she said and this and that. It was to the point where I would wake up friends with someone and go to bed not talking to them ever again. Time after time. I’ve never made and lost so many friends in such a short amount of time. It was crazy. I think I really changed and probably not for the better. I know I’ve become so much more guarded because I don’t trust people the way I used to. I used to really be an open book, but by the end of this year, I kept my mouth shut. I even stopped talking about the little things I knew about  people because this place was just so…toxic socially. But maybe that’s not that bad. I think its probably better to just keep my mouth shut. By the end of the year, I literally just stopped going to the law school for anything other than class. No events, no nothing. I couldn’t be there anymore. It was the worst feeling.  I also started feeling really trapped in my law school life. I was going to the same building in the same two classrooms day after day. I couldn’t take it anymore. I really started to hate it. Then I really started to question law school. I didn’t want to be there anymore. At all. I was done. I didn’t care. I lost all motivation. I just couldn’t. I wanted to just leave so bad. I really felt like it was a mistake…like I should have become a writer or something. I don’t know. There was a lot of “is this what I want?” Looking at some of my classmates, its like they were made to be lawyers. But me? I became this free-spirited butterfly who doesn’t care about anything but my own happiness over the past couple of years and I’m supposed to train for a job where there’s no creativity or individuality? That shit scared me. It STILL does.  Whatever, hopefully this semester goes better than last grade-wise. At the end of the day, I know I can’t do worse. Hopefully, my job this summer makes me want to actually do this. My friends think I’m playing when I say I’m not coming back if this summer isn’t magical as fuck. I’m totally not. 

My first year of law school is over. I really have mixed feelings. This year was really hard emotionally. Work-wise it was fine. I could handle everything and pretty much did everything I wanted. I really think I had a great school-life balance. I talked to my friends on the phone more than ever, at least 3 times a week. I texted with them mostly everyday…I hung out with boys on the side. Visited home a few times. I was probably the most social person out of the black people. Our house was the kick it house, so people were always here. Lots of game nights, parties and general ratchetness. I never really experienced stress either. IDK it just wasn’t the 1L shitshow I was expecting.

But omg, there was SO MUCH DRAMA. Allll the time and I felt like I was always at the center of it. I’ve NEVER had that problem in my life. Law school was literally like Basketball Wives. There were so many fights and fallouts with girls and guys and he said and she said and this and that. It was to the point where I would wake up friends with someone and go to bed not talking to them ever again. Time after time. I’ve never made and lost so many friends in such a short amount of time. It was crazy. I think I really changed and probably not for the better. I know I’ve become so much more guarded because I don’t trust people the way I used to. I used to really be an open book, but by the end of this year, I kept my mouth shut. I even stopped talking about the little things I knew about  people because this place was just so…toxic socially. But maybe that’s not that bad. I think its probably better to just keep my mouth shut. By the end of the year, I literally just stopped going to the law school for anything other than class. No events, no nothing. I couldn’t be there anymore. It was the worst feeling. 

I also started feeling really trapped in my law school life. I was going to the same building in the same two classrooms day after day. I couldn’t take it anymore. I really started to hate it. Then I really started to question law school. I didn’t want to be there anymore. At all. I was done. I didn’t care. I lost all motivation. I just couldn’t. I wanted to just leave so bad. I really felt like it was a mistake…like I should have become a writer or something. I don’t know. There was a lot of “is this what I want?” Looking at some of my classmates, its like they were made to be lawyers. But me? I became this free-spirited butterfly who doesn’t care about anything but my own happiness over the past couple of years and I’m supposed to train for a job where there’s no creativity or individuality? That shit scared me. It STILL does. 

Whatever, hopefully this semester goes better than last grade-wise. At the end of the day, I know I can’t do worse. Hopefully, my job this summer makes me want to actually do this. My friends think I’m playing when I say I’m not coming back if this summer isn’t magical as fuck. I’m totally not. 

2 weeks ago 

I Made Somethin’ Out of Nothing. Thanks for Nothing.

So, I just watched this episode of Reed Between the Lines that I had saved on my DVR. It’s a later episode so I’ve gotten into the characters and especially the dynamics of the main character’s marriage. They’re happy and supportive and well…mature. They have problems but always have this holistic and reasonable way of solving problems in an open and honest way. 

This particular episode really struck a chord with me. In it, Carla finds out that her ex-husband who worked too much, cheated, and ultimately left her alone with twins has become this great guy and is engaged. Not only is he engaged but he’s being a better man to her than he ever was with Carla. Carla turns to her husband for support and he (being uncomfortable) suggests that she speak to her therapist about why she has those issues.

She has the same conversation w/her therapist I’ve had a few times—That it’s not fair. You love someone and they hurt you as much as they possibly can and then resolve themselves to never treating who?…THE NEXT WOMAN that way. And you know what? It really isn’t fair. Her Therapist told her “its not fair. but so what?” That’s basically all u get. its’ not fair. And? Nothing. That’s it. So you move on and don’t look back.

Turns out Carla still felt that she didn’t get any closure bc he never apologized, but didn’t understand why, after 13 years, she could be so hurt and angry. Those issues resolve themselves over time if you deal with them instead of masking them. 

One thing that I know is that I never want to be the person that hurts someone and doesn’t make it right. I mean, people will always get hurt incidentally when your intentions don’t line up with theirs. BUT to do something you know is mean and go on with your life…? I don’t want to be that person. I don’t want to be that person because I know that caring about how I make people feel is how I’m going to succeed professionally and personally and in my relationships later. That’s what my last two relationships taught me. My ex-ex showed me how painful it is when someone doesn’t care how they’re making you feel. My relationship after that showed me that I wasn’t so great in that area myself. In fact, I was caught off guard when he would tell me “I CARE what you think about me.” My first thought would be “Why? you’re your own person. Do u” But it’s not that simple. I always thought I was sufficiently invested in him emotionally but was so far off. I didn’t care how I made him feel. That’s something that a lot of relationships are probably missing but the relationship I WANT and NEED will be one where I’m invested in their emotional satisfaction, not just the shallower aspects of everything. Hopefully, it will be returned. I know far off from being 100%, though.

I don’t want to be that person because people have been that to me. A lot of people. The people I’ve cared about most in life have done to me.  Yet, I was that person this year to a classmate of mine. I was really mean…overly mean. And the guilt ate me up months later. I was dreaming about how I had treated this person and how it must have felt for her. I’ve never been that person so why now? I don’t know. But it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I didn’t like me because of it. All that mattered was that I couldn’t deal with knowing what I had done and how I had acted. Everyone told me “why do u care?” I cared because I couldn’t stop being that person unless I confronted the person I was. That meant apologizing to the girl. She respected my apology, but didn’t “accept it” in the sense that she was going to forgive me. That was fine. I just wanted her to know that I was sorry. It was like a WEIGHT was lifted off of me. The thing was, I had NO reason or explanation for why I had done what I did. She asked me why…how…what had she done? The answer was nothing. I was just being mean and not caring about how I was making her feel. The apology wasn’t to make it right or get her to like me or for us to be friends. She actually doesn’t speak to me at all…or look at me…or acknowledge me since the apology. But that’s okay. She at least knows that I’m sorry and that’s enough. At least things are fair.

3 weeks ago 

I’d rather post random pics from my iPhoto than outline. Sidenote: I really can’t wait for my summer to begin. I just wanna work and have fun. No class. No reading. No outlining. No drama. Vegas baby!

1 month ago 

Things you think about when stranded in an airport: 1. Your exes. I don’t know what it is but having time to sit and think makes you think about people you’ve stopped thinking about all the time.  2. Your future. When you’re in law school, life is all about your future. Because you’re  building it. Literally.  3. The reading I could be doing. Yea…I have so much reading to do. It’s weighing me down as I write this. 4. Your friends. I have stuff to tell them. So, I guess it’s fitting that they’re on my mind.  5. How tired you are. I’m exhausted right now. Fuck. 6. Where will I sleep tonight if I don’t get on this flight. Really…I’m nervous about that.  7. Rihanna. She’s crazy and I follow her on twitter so…yeah. 8. Where I was this time last year. I was in Portugal…THIS close to being arrested.  9. Who the fuck designed this airport? Why does it take 45 mins to walk from one gate to another? I seen people stopping and taking breaks.  10. Why am I so sore? No really…I wanna know.  11. Thank God for technology and chargers.

Things you think about when stranded in an airport:

1. Your exes. I don’t know what it is but having time to sit and think makes you think about people you’ve stopped thinking about all the time. 

2. Your future. When you’re in law school, life is all about your future. Because you’re  building it. Literally. 

3. The reading I could be doing. Yea…I have so much reading to do. It’s weighing me down as I write this.

4. Your friends. I have stuff to tell them. So, I guess it’s fitting that they’re on my mind. 

5. How tired you are. I’m exhausted right now. Fuck.

6. Where will I sleep tonight if I don’t get on this flight. Really…I’m nervous about that. 

7. Rihanna. She’s crazy and I follow her on twitter so…yeah.

8. Where I was this time last year. I was in Portugal…THIS close to being arrested. 

9. Who the fuck designed this airport? Why does it take 45 mins to walk from one gate to another? I seen people stopping and taking breaks. 

10. Why am I so sore? No really…I wanna know. 

11. Thank God for technology and chargers.

2 months ago  View Larger Image

I just had a really crazy Spring Break trip. I went to Cali for Annie’s bday party, which was Cray cray. She got a hotel in SF and everyone just got really drunk and crazy. Then, Drizzy was in town so I saw him again. I brought Annie with me this time, though (that’s where the photo above was taken). That was an interesting experience to say the least. Anyways, I finished up my break with a trip to Cancun with 2 of my classmates. It was fun and the water was beautiful. I literally just spent 3 days in the water. On thursday night, we just went to the beach and were playin around until like 2am in the water. Friday, we went to these super crazy, crowded, gross night clubs. Saturday, I had the TIME OF MY LIFE at this club called Coco Bongo. I was super skeptical bc I thought it’d be like the night before but was literally the most fun I’ve ever had. I mean, i’ve had get drunk, get wild fun…but last night was just pure fun. i wasn’t even drunk! Now, I’m sitting in Houston Airport where almost every flight was canceled/delayed by 5 hours. My flight was supposed to leave at 7 and isn’t leaving until 1am. I’m so tired. I got like 3 hours of sleep last night. I don’t wanna complain bc I fly for free and the whole airport is goin thru it. But this effing sucks…especially because I lost my debit card and dont have any money.At least there’s a lot of cute boys here. I’m sure I can find someone to entertain me for a few hours. haha. 

I just had a really crazy Spring Break trip. I went to Cali for Annie’s bday party, which was Cray cray. She got a hotel in SF and everyone just got really drunk and crazy. Then, Drizzy was in town so I saw him again. I brought Annie with me this time, though (that’s where the photo above was taken). That was an interesting experience to say the least. Anyways, I finished up my break with a trip to Cancun with 2 of my classmates. It was fun and the water was beautiful. I literally just spent 3 days in the water. On thursday night, we just went to the beach and were playin around until like 2am in the water. Friday, we went to these super crazy, crowded, gross night clubs. Saturday, I had the TIME OF MY LIFE at this club called Coco Bongo. I was super skeptical bc I thought it’d be like the night before but was literally the most fun I’ve ever had. I mean, i’ve had get drunk, get wild fun…but last night was just pure fun. i wasn’t even drunk!

Now, I’m sitting in Houston Airport where almost every flight was canceled/delayed by 5 hours. My flight was supposed to leave at 7 and isn’t leaving until 1am. I’m so tired. I got like 3 hours of sleep last night. I don’t wanna complain bc I fly for free and the whole airport is goin thru it. But this effing sucks…especially because I lost my debit card and dont have any money.At least there’s a lot of cute boys here. I’m sure I can find someone to entertain me for a few hours. haha. 

2 months ago 

Man, I’ve never experienced such lack of motivation. This is crazy. I know I have to work hard this semester but I just don’t care about this anymore. I think everything I felt about law school last year is still there. It’s not hard work-wise…I just don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t quit but ugh…I fucking could though. 

Man, I’ve never experienced such lack of motivation. This is crazy. I know I have to work hard this semester but I just don’t care about this anymore. I think everything I felt about law school last year is still there. It’s not hard work-wise…I just don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t quit but ugh…I fucking could though. 

3 months ago  View Larger Image

Barristers and such…

3 months ago 

Oh yeah…I turned 25 (and got my braces off!!!). I had a lowkey birthday this yr. Just went to dinner on the day of. It was just okay. I think it’s just a representation of how this next year is going to be. blah. However, I am super excited to be 25. It’s such a sexy and confident age. 

3 months ago 

I met Drake!!!!! Man, I am on cloud 9…it was fate. I can’t even believe it. I’ve been a fan for so long and to finally be able to meet him was crazy to me. 

3 months ago 

I’m not gonna lie…2012 is rough. I’m so not feeling law school…not the work in particular, just the concept.  I could leave tomorrow and never look back. I just don’t feel as solid about this as I did every other endeavor in my life. I’m scared it’s too big of a risk and not enough of a guarantee it will be worth it. The job search is scary. The idea I may not do well this semester is scary…IDK it’s just like…not fulfilling. I don’t know how to force myself back into the groove of things. I go to class but it’s not clicking with me on a Wanting to be here level. I just don’t want to be here that much. Hopefully things look up but this is so rough.

I’m not gonna lie…2012 is rough. I’m so not feeling law school…not the work in particular, just the concept.  I could leave tomorrow and never look back. I just don’t feel as solid about this as I did every other endeavor in my life. I’m scared it’s too big of a risk and not enough of a guarantee it will be worth it. The job search is scary. The idea I may not do well this semester is scary…IDK it’s just like…not fulfilling. I don’t know how to force myself back into the groove of things. I go to class but it’s not clicking with me on a Wanting to be here level. I just don’t want to be here that much. Hopefully things look up but this is so rough.

3 months ago  View Larger Image

My first year of law school is over. I really have mixed feelings. This year was really hard emotionally. Work-wise it was fine. I could handle everything and pretty much did everything I wanted. I really think I had a great school-life balance. I talked to my friends on the phone more than ever, at least 3 times a week. I texted with them mostly everyday…I hung out with boys on the side. Visited home a few times. I was probably the most social person out of the black people. Our house was the kick it house, so people were always here. Lots of game nights, parties and general ratchetness. I never really experienced stress either. IDK it just wasn’t the 1L shitshow I was expecting. But omg, there was SO MUCH DRAMA. Allll the time and I felt like I was always at the center of it. I’ve NEVER had that problem in my life. Law school was literally like Basketball Wives. There were so many fights and fallouts with girls and guys and he said and she said and this and that. It was to the point where I would wake up friends with someone and go to bed not talking to them ever again. Time after time. I’ve never made and lost so many friends in such a short amount of time. It was crazy. I think I really changed and probably not for the better. I know I’ve become so much more guarded because I don’t trust people the way I used to. I used to really be an open book, but by the end of this year, I kept my mouth shut. I even stopped talking about the little things I knew about  people because this place was just so…toxic socially. But maybe that’s not that bad. I think its probably better to just keep my mouth shut. By the end of the year, I literally just stopped going to the law school for anything other than class. No events, no nothing. I couldn’t be there anymore. It was the worst feeling.  I also started feeling really trapped in my law school life. I was going to the same building in the same two classrooms day after day. I couldn’t take it anymore. I really started to hate it. Then I really started to question law school. I didn’t want to be there anymore. At all. I was done. I didn’t care. I lost all motivation. I just couldn’t. I wanted to just leave so bad. I really felt like it was a mistake…like I should have become a writer or something. I don’t know. There was a lot of “is this what I want?” Looking at some of my classmates, its like they were made to be lawyers. But me? I became this free-spirited butterfly who doesn’t care about anything but my own happiness over the past couple of years and I’m supposed to train for a job where there’s no creativity or individuality? That shit scared me. It STILL does.  Whatever, hopefully this semester goes better than last grade-wise. At the end of the day, I know I can’t do worse. Hopefully, my job this summer makes me want to actually do this. My friends think I’m playing when I say I’m not coming back if this summer isn’t magical as fuck. I’m totally not. 

My first year of law school is over. I really have mixed feelings. This year was really hard emotionally. Work-wise it was fine. I could handle everything and pretty much did everything I wanted. I really think I had a great school-life balance. I talked to my friends on the phone more than ever, at least 3 times a week. I texted with them mostly everyday…I hung out with boys on the side. Visited home a few times. I was probably the most social person out of the black people. Our house was the kick it house, so people were always here. Lots of game nights, parties and general ratchetness. I never really experienced stress either. IDK it just wasn’t the 1L shitshow I was expecting.

But omg, there was SO MUCH DRAMA. Allll the time and I felt like I was always at the center of it. I’ve NEVER had that problem in my life. Law school was literally like Basketball Wives. There were so many fights and fallouts with girls and guys and he said and she said and this and that. It was to the point where I would wake up friends with someone and go to bed not talking to them ever again. Time after time. I’ve never made and lost so many friends in such a short amount of time. It was crazy. I think I really changed and probably not for the better. I know I’ve become so much more guarded because I don’t trust people the way I used to. I used to really be an open book, but by the end of this year, I kept my mouth shut. I even stopped talking about the little things I knew about  people because this place was just so…toxic socially. But maybe that’s not that bad. I think its probably better to just keep my mouth shut. By the end of the year, I literally just stopped going to the law school for anything other than class. No events, no nothing. I couldn’t be there anymore. It was the worst feeling. 

I also started feeling really trapped in my law school life. I was going to the same building in the same two classrooms day after day. I couldn’t take it anymore. I really started to hate it. Then I really started to question law school. I didn’t want to be there anymore. At all. I was done. I didn’t care. I lost all motivation. I just couldn’t. I wanted to just leave so bad. I really felt like it was a mistake…like I should have become a writer or something. I don’t know. There was a lot of “is this what I want?” Looking at some of my classmates, its like they were made to be lawyers. But me? I became this free-spirited butterfly who doesn’t care about anything but my own happiness over the past couple of years and I’m supposed to train for a job where there’s no creativity or individuality? That shit scared me. It STILL does. 

Whatever, hopefully this semester goes better than last grade-wise. At the end of the day, I know I can’t do worse. Hopefully, my job this summer makes me want to actually do this. My friends think I’m playing when I say I’m not coming back if this summer isn’t magical as fuck. I’m totally not. 

I Made Somethin’ Out of Nothing. Thanks for Nothing.

So, I just watched this episode of Reed Between the Lines that I had saved on my DVR. It’s a later episode so I’ve gotten into the characters and especially the dynamics of the main character’s marriage. They’re happy and supportive and well…mature. They have problems but always have this holistic and reasonable way of solving problems in an open and honest way. 

This particular episode really struck a chord with me. In it, Carla finds out that her ex-husband who worked too much, cheated, and ultimately left her alone with twins has become this great guy and is engaged. Not only is he engaged but he’s being a better man to her than he ever was with Carla. Carla turns to her husband for support and he (being uncomfortable) suggests that she speak to her therapist about why she has those issues.

She has the same conversation w/her therapist I’ve had a few times—That it’s not fair. You love someone and they hurt you as much as they possibly can and then resolve themselves to never treating who?…THE NEXT WOMAN that way. And you know what? It really isn’t fair. Her Therapist told her “its not fair. but so what?” That’s basically all u get. its’ not fair. And? Nothing. That’s it. So you move on and don’t look back.

Turns out Carla still felt that she didn’t get any closure bc he never apologized, but didn’t understand why, after 13 years, she could be so hurt and angry. Those issues resolve themselves over time if you deal with them instead of masking them. 

One thing that I know is that I never want to be the person that hurts someone and doesn’t make it right. I mean, people will always get hurt incidentally when your intentions don’t line up with theirs. BUT to do something you know is mean and go on with your life…? I don’t want to be that person. I don’t want to be that person because I know that caring about how I make people feel is how I’m going to succeed professionally and personally and in my relationships later. That’s what my last two relationships taught me. My ex-ex showed me how painful it is when someone doesn’t care how they’re making you feel. My relationship after that showed me that I wasn’t so great in that area myself. In fact, I was caught off guard when he would tell me “I CARE what you think about me.” My first thought would be “Why? you’re your own person. Do u” But it’s not that simple. I always thought I was sufficiently invested in him emotionally but was so far off. I didn’t care how I made him feel. That’s something that a lot of relationships are probably missing but the relationship I WANT and NEED will be one where I’m invested in their emotional satisfaction, not just the shallower aspects of everything. Hopefully, it will be returned. I know far off from being 100%, though.

I don’t want to be that person because people have been that to me. A lot of people. The people I’ve cared about most in life have done to me.  Yet, I was that person this year to a classmate of mine. I was really mean…overly mean. And the guilt ate me up months later. I was dreaming about how I had treated this person and how it must have felt for her. I’ve never been that person so why now? I don’t know. But it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I didn’t like me because of it. All that mattered was that I couldn’t deal with knowing what I had done and how I had acted. Everyone told me “why do u care?” I cared because I couldn’t stop being that person unless I confronted the person I was. That meant apologizing to the girl. She respected my apology, but didn’t “accept it” in the sense that she was going to forgive me. That was fine. I just wanted her to know that I was sorry. It was like a WEIGHT was lifted off of me. The thing was, I had NO reason or explanation for why I had done what I did. She asked me why…how…what had she done? The answer was nothing. I was just being mean and not caring about how I was making her feel. The apology wasn’t to make it right or get her to like me or for us to be friends. She actually doesn’t speak to me at all…or look at me…or acknowledge me since the apology. But that’s okay. She at least knows that I’m sorry and that’s enough. At least things are fair.

I’d rather post random pics from my iPhoto than outline. Sidenote: I really can’t wait for my summer to begin. I just wanna work and have fun. No class. No reading. No outlining. No drama. Vegas baby!

Things you think about when stranded in an airport: 1. Your exes. I don’t know what it is but having time to sit and think makes you think about people you’ve stopped thinking about all the time.  2. Your future. When you’re in law school, life is all about your future. Because you’re  building it. Literally.  3. The reading I could be doing. Yea…I have so much reading to do. It’s weighing me down as I write this. 4. Your friends. I have stuff to tell them. So, I guess it’s fitting that they’re on my mind.  5. How tired you are. I’m exhausted right now. Fuck. 6. Where will I sleep tonight if I don’t get on this flight. Really…I’m nervous about that.  7. Rihanna. She’s crazy and I follow her on twitter so…yeah. 8. Where I was this time last year. I was in Portugal…THIS close to being arrested.  9. Who the fuck designed this airport? Why does it take 45 mins to walk from one gate to another? I seen people stopping and taking breaks.  10. Why am I so sore? No really…I wanna know.  11. Thank God for technology and chargers.

Things you think about when stranded in an airport:

1. Your exes. I don’t know what it is but having time to sit and think makes you think about people you’ve stopped thinking about all the time. 

2. Your future. When you’re in law school, life is all about your future. Because you’re  building it. Literally. 

3. The reading I could be doing. Yea…I have so much reading to do. It’s weighing me down as I write this.

4. Your friends. I have stuff to tell them. So, I guess it’s fitting that they’re on my mind. 

5. How tired you are. I’m exhausted right now. Fuck.

6. Where will I sleep tonight if I don’t get on this flight. Really…I’m nervous about that. 

7. Rihanna. She’s crazy and I follow her on twitter so…yeah.

8. Where I was this time last year. I was in Portugal…THIS close to being arrested. 

9. Who the fuck designed this airport? Why does it take 45 mins to walk from one gate to another? I seen people stopping and taking breaks. 

10. Why am I so sore? No really…I wanna know. 

11. Thank God for technology and chargers.

I just had a really crazy Spring Break trip. I went to Cali for Annie’s bday party, which was Cray cray. She got a hotel in SF and everyone just got really drunk and crazy. Then, Drizzy was in town so I saw him again. I brought Annie with me this time, though (that’s where the photo above was taken). That was an interesting experience to say the least. Anyways, I finished up my break with a trip to Cancun with 2 of my classmates. It was fun and the water was beautiful. I literally just spent 3 days in the water. On thursday night, we just went to the beach and were playin around until like 2am in the water. Friday, we went to these super crazy, crowded, gross night clubs. Saturday, I had the TIME OF MY LIFE at this club called Coco Bongo. I was super skeptical bc I thought it’d be like the night before but was literally the most fun I’ve ever had. I mean, i’ve had get drunk, get wild fun…but last night was just pure fun. i wasn’t even drunk! Now, I’m sitting in Houston Airport where almost every flight was canceled/delayed by 5 hours. My flight was supposed to leave at 7 and isn’t leaving until 1am. I’m so tired. I got like 3 hours of sleep last night. I don’t wanna complain bc I fly for free and the whole airport is goin thru it. But this effing sucks…especially because I lost my debit card and dont have any money.At least there’s a lot of cute boys here. I’m sure I can find someone to entertain me for a few hours. haha. 

I just had a really crazy Spring Break trip. I went to Cali for Annie’s bday party, which was Cray cray. She got a hotel in SF and everyone just got really drunk and crazy. Then, Drizzy was in town so I saw him again. I brought Annie with me this time, though (that’s where the photo above was taken). That was an interesting experience to say the least. Anyways, I finished up my break with a trip to Cancun with 2 of my classmates. It was fun and the water was beautiful. I literally just spent 3 days in the water. On thursday night, we just went to the beach and were playin around until like 2am in the water. Friday, we went to these super crazy, crowded, gross night clubs. Saturday, I had the TIME OF MY LIFE at this club called Coco Bongo. I was super skeptical bc I thought it’d be like the night before but was literally the most fun I’ve ever had. I mean, i’ve had get drunk, get wild fun…but last night was just pure fun. i wasn’t even drunk!

Now, I’m sitting in Houston Airport where almost every flight was canceled/delayed by 5 hours. My flight was supposed to leave at 7 and isn’t leaving until 1am. I’m so tired. I got like 3 hours of sleep last night. I don’t wanna complain bc I fly for free and the whole airport is goin thru it. But this effing sucks…especially because I lost my debit card and dont have any money.At least there’s a lot of cute boys here. I’m sure I can find someone to entertain me for a few hours. haha. 

Man, I’ve never experienced such lack of motivation. This is crazy. I know I have to work hard this semester but I just don’t care about this anymore. I think everything I felt about law school last year is still there. It’s not hard work-wise…I just don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t quit but ugh…I fucking could though. 

Man, I’ve never experienced such lack of motivation. This is crazy. I know I have to work hard this semester but I just don’t care about this anymore. I think everything I felt about law school last year is still there. It’s not hard work-wise…I just don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t quit but ugh…I fucking could though. 

Barristers and such…

Oh yeah…I turned 25 (and got my braces off!!!). I had a lowkey birthday this yr. Just went to dinner on the day of. It was just okay. I think it’s just a representation of how this next year is going to be. blah. However, I am super excited to be 25. It’s such a sexy and confident age. 

I met Drake!!!!! Man, I am on cloud 9…it was fate. I can’t even believe it. I’ve been a fan for so long and to finally be able to meet him was crazy to me. 

I’m not gonna lie…2012 is rough. I’m so not feeling law school…not the work in particular, just the concept.  I could leave tomorrow and never look back. I just don’t feel as solid about this as I did every other endeavor in my life. I’m scared it’s too big of a risk and not enough of a guarantee it will be worth it. The job search is scary. The idea I may not do well this semester is scary…IDK it’s just like…not fulfilling. I don’t know how to force myself back into the groove of things. I go to class but it’s not clicking with me on a Wanting to be here level. I just don’t want to be here that much. Hopefully things look up but this is so rough.

I’m not gonna lie…2012 is rough. I’m so not feeling law school…not the work in particular, just the concept.  I could leave tomorrow and never look back. I just don’t feel as solid about this as I did every other endeavor in my life. I’m scared it’s too big of a risk and not enough of a guarantee it will be worth it. The job search is scary. The idea I may not do well this semester is scary…IDK it’s just like…not fulfilling. I don’t know how to force myself back into the groove of things. I go to class but it’s not clicking with me on a Wanting to be here level. I just don’t want to be here that much. Hopefully things look up but this is so rough.

I Made Somethin’ Out of Nothing. Thanks for Nothing.
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Scared that my youth will be sucked away by law school in a few short months. Here, I document the crazy, boring, funny and random things I do [and the people along for the ride]

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